Baby, it's cold outside! It was below zero when I woke, 10 degrees by noon, and I never heard the wind chill reading.
There are splotches of blue sky overhead and, yes, I did see the sun shining for several minutes again this morning. Each time the sun pierces through heavy cloud cover it feels miraculous.
Monkey Mind was busy during my T'ai Chi Chih practice this morning. Despite that fact I moved with softness and felt the Chi.
I focused on my center (t'an tien) today since that strategy was used by the T'ai Chi master on the Parkinson's DVD I watched several days ago. My students could benefit from spending more class time moving from--and focusing on--t'an tien. Since all movements originate from the center it makes sense to spend more teaching time there.
After TCC practice I took a 45 minute walk. It was frigid! Frances abandoned me at the end of the driveway when the north wind hit her face. Too cold, she said and turned around. I marched on and eventually warmed up. It's going to be a cold week. Luckily I can--and will--practice TCC in the warmth and comfort of my home.
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Monday, December 6, 2010
TCC for Energy and Renewal
The sun shone through the dark sky for a few minutes this morning before two heavy banks of clouds squeezed it into submission. I enjoyed its brief shimmering light.
I performed a late morning, pre-work TCC practice that felt like a good self-prep before I headed to the library. My sole practice companion: a woodpecker flitting from feeder to tree trunk.
Last night I watched and followed along with a loaner copy of T'ai Chi for Energy and Renewal: Living Well with Parkinson's Disease. The DVD was produced by Boehringer Ingelheim Pharmaceuticals, Inc. in 2007. The T'ai Chi master who led the practice focused on breathing techniques, Chi Kung warm-ups, and T'ai Chi exercises, both seated and standing.
It was interesting to see and experience a T'ai Chi short form geared toward a specific population. The focus was on relaxation and stress reduction and the teacher presented the movements in a clear, simple manner. Nevertheless, it was hard to follow along. And I was reminded that it's important to study with a real live in-the-flesh teacher.
Afterward watching the T'ai Chi DVD I performed my T'ai Chi Chih practice and felt grateful for its straightforward simplicity. And that's how today's practice felt too: straightforward; simple; relaxed; and brimming with energy.
I performed a late morning, pre-work TCC practice that felt like a good self-prep before I headed to the library. My sole practice companion: a woodpecker flitting from feeder to tree trunk.
Last night I watched and followed along with a loaner copy of T'ai Chi for Energy and Renewal: Living Well with Parkinson's Disease. The DVD was produced by Boehringer Ingelheim Pharmaceuticals, Inc. in 2007. The T'ai Chi master who led the practice focused on breathing techniques, Chi Kung warm-ups, and T'ai Chi exercises, both seated and standing.
It was interesting to see and experience a T'ai Chi short form geared toward a specific population. The focus was on relaxation and stress reduction and the teacher presented the movements in a clear, simple manner. Nevertheless, it was hard to follow along. And I was reminded that it's important to study with a real live in-the-flesh teacher.
Afterward watching the T'ai Chi DVD I performed my T'ai Chi Chih practice and felt grateful for its straightforward simplicity. And that's how today's practice felt too: straightforward; simple; relaxed; and brimming with energy.
Sunday, December 5, 2010
Awareness is Your Refuge
I started to feel better last night and I feel even softer and lighter today. This is interesting given the InnerNet Weekly and Dharma Quotes I read this morning that reiterated a consistent theme I began to recognize yesterday: My times of feeling down (or up) are a choice on my part whether I consciously recognize or acknowledge that fact. Osho writes in "You Carry Your Wound":
In a Dharma quote from Snow Lion Publications Lama Dudjom Dorjee writes (From: Heartfelt Advice):
With the ego, your whole being is a wound. And you carry it around. Nobody is interested in hurting you, nobody is positively waiting to hurt you; everybody is engaged in safeguarding his own wound.... you are so ready to be wounded, so ready, just waiting on the brink for anything. You cannot touch a man of Tao. Why? - because there is no one to be touched. There is no wound. He is healthy, healed, whole.A meditation practice offers us awareness. It's possible that my desire to soften the tightness and tension in my hands and wrists during yesterday's practice had a palpable effect on my mental/emotional holding. It's also regretable that when we feel caught up in our dramas and traumas, it is difficult to discipline ourselves to stay with or return to our practice.
In a Dharma quote from Snow Lion Publications Lama Dudjom Dorjee writes (From: Heartfelt Advice):
As practitioners we will face many obstacles and sidetracks on our path to liberation.... We shouldn't allow our practice to become interrupted due to these obstacles and sidetracks, such as the appearance and disappearance of the many friends we will have over the course of our lives....I feel grateful that, despite my sagging heart I continued to practice T'ai Chi Chih daily during this past week. Though I didn't always feel fabulous while I practiced nevertheless I continued. And now something is shifting, changing, moving....
And we shouldn't allow our practice to become interrupted by the obstacles and sidetracks presented by the many distractions of mind that are readily available in the mundane world of our external environment. We shouldn't allow our practice to be interrupted by obstacles and sidetracks that arise due to the desire and attachment we feel for loved ones, or our aversion to enemies, or our indifference towards others....
Awareness is your refuge:From: Intuitive Awareness by Ajahn Sumedho, reprinted by "InnerNet Weekly: Trust in the Awareness," Nov. 9, 2010.
Awareness of the changingness of feelings,
of attitudes, of moods, of material change
and emotional change:
Stay with that, because it's a refuge that is
indestructible.
It's not something that changes.
It's a refuge you can trust in.
This refuge is not something that you create.
It's not a creation. It's not an ideal.
It's very practical and very simple, but
easily overlooked or not noticed.
When you're mindful,
you're beginning to notice,
it's like this.
Saturday, December 4, 2010
Therapeutic Chi Chih
I feel as if I'm adrift in a sea of sadness. There are many possible reasons for this emotional state but two likely ones come to mind: SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) and my innate resistance to change.
Since I can't make the sun shine and the 10-day forecast predicts that I won't see a shining yellow orb in the sky until a week from today I'm left to pursue other options. Take a larger dose of Vit. D. Get regular daily exercise. Commit to more than one TCC practice a day.
My attitude toward change is another matter entirely. Intellectually I know that change is the only constant in life. But when change affects me directly and (in my mind) negatively, I don't/won't/can't accept it willingly. Go ahead. Drag me kicking and screaming from the room.
During this afternoon's TCC practice my hands and wrists felt stiff and tight. Could that feeling relate directly to my resistance to what's happening in my life right now? Was I grasping? Holding on too tight? Desiring to control or influence something--or someone?--over which/whom I have no control? Perhaps.
The least I could do was release the tension from my hands and my wrists ... allow myself to feel softness ... and notice whether the physical release had any effect on my emotional state. It appears that it did. I'm writing my blog. Moving around. Feeling slightly more upbeat. And ... who knows?
Since I can't make the sun shine and the 10-day forecast predicts that I won't see a shining yellow orb in the sky until a week from today I'm left to pursue other options. Take a larger dose of Vit. D. Get regular daily exercise. Commit to more than one TCC practice a day.
My attitude toward change is another matter entirely. Intellectually I know that change is the only constant in life. But when change affects me directly and (in my mind) negatively, I don't/won't/can't accept it willingly. Go ahead. Drag me kicking and screaming from the room.
During this afternoon's TCC practice my hands and wrists felt stiff and tight. Could that feeling relate directly to my resistance to what's happening in my life right now? Was I grasping? Holding on too tight? Desiring to control or influence something--or someone?--over which/whom I have no control? Perhaps.
The least I could do was release the tension from my hands and my wrists ... allow myself to feel softness ... and notice whether the physical release had any effect on my emotional state. It appears that it did. I'm writing my blog. Moving around. Feeling slightly more upbeat. And ... who knows?
Friday, December 3, 2010
May you walk gently through the world ...
Today is my birthday. This annual event provides me with the opportunity to consider years past, the people I've known, memories of my parents who've been dead for many years, and how I choose to live my life day after day, year by year, hour upon hour.
I started the day with my TCC practice. Out on the porch directly in front of a space heater I felt comfortable despite the 10 degree temperature outside. With windows on three sides of me I watched the whiteness. All seemed quiet except for the flicker of a blue jay that landed on the drive to pick at the remains of goose corn. That same jay flew next to the south ravine and dunked his beak into whatever fresh, unfrozen water ran there.
During my practice I felt the Chi energy even as I felt my mind wandering. Sometimes birthdays and holidays have too much expectation tied into their packaging. My knees felt sore from last night's TCC practice and I focused my attention on relaxing, releasing, softening, letting go....
While Frances fixed breakfast I luxuriated in the richness of a day in which I can choose every single event and activity I wish. Perhaps every day could be this way but I seldom feel that I have the freedom to act as if this is so. Consequently it's a wonderful gift I give myself to consciously choose every single thing I wish to experience on this singular day.
While writing I reread and let the words of this Apache Blessing take up residence within me. My youngest brother emailed this to me over a year ago during a difficult time in my life and it's taped to a file cabinet next to my computer:
I started the day with my TCC practice. Out on the porch directly in front of a space heater I felt comfortable despite the 10 degree temperature outside. With windows on three sides of me I watched the whiteness. All seemed quiet except for the flicker of a blue jay that landed on the drive to pick at the remains of goose corn. That same jay flew next to the south ravine and dunked his beak into whatever fresh, unfrozen water ran there.
During my practice I felt the Chi energy even as I felt my mind wandering. Sometimes birthdays and holidays have too much expectation tied into their packaging. My knees felt sore from last night's TCC practice and I focused my attention on relaxing, releasing, softening, letting go....
While Frances fixed breakfast I luxuriated in the richness of a day in which I can choose every single event and activity I wish. Perhaps every day could be this way but I seldom feel that I have the freedom to act as if this is so. Consequently it's a wonderful gift I give myself to consciously choose every single thing I wish to experience on this singular day.
While writing I reread and let the words of this Apache Blessing take up residence within me. My youngest brother emailed this to me over a year ago during a difficult time in my life and it's taped to a file cabinet next to my computer:
May the sun bring you new energy everyday.
May the moon softly restore you by night.
May the rain wash away your worries.
May the breeze blow new strength into your being.
May you walk gently through the world and know its beauty all the days
of your life.
Thursday, December 2, 2010
T'ai Chi Chih Comfort
Brrr. Temps climbed from a chill 8 degrees to a warmer 12 degrees under cloud-filled skies today. It was difficult to venture outside after last week's East Coast visit that felt cold when temperatures were in the mid- to high-40s. Of course comfort's all about being appropriately dressed. When I finally walked down the driveway in late afternoon to retrieve the mail, I felt comfy cozy.
I'm still settling back into the rhythm of home life while sorting through mail, emails, spoiling food in the refrigerature and the like. In three weeks days will begin to lengthen. Until then the dog and cat spend long hours asleep in various chairs throughout the house.
This evening's TCC practice was interrupted by phone calls and Frances's difficulty in scheduling a birthday dinner for me tomorrow night. I felt disappointed but just kept moving through the form. There are a wealth of options for celebrating and, since I enjoy spending time quietly reading, walking, writing, etc., I could easily pass my birthday alone in quiet solitude.
With TCC practice over I feel exceedingly tired. And relaxed. And grateful that this day is drawing to a close....
I'm still settling back into the rhythm of home life while sorting through mail, emails, spoiling food in the refrigerature and the like. In three weeks days will begin to lengthen. Until then the dog and cat spend long hours asleep in various chairs throughout the house.
This evening's TCC practice was interrupted by phone calls and Frances's difficulty in scheduling a birthday dinner for me tomorrow night. I felt disappointed but just kept moving through the form. There are a wealth of options for celebrating and, since I enjoy spending time quietly reading, walking, writing, etc., I could easily pass my birthday alone in quiet solitude.
With TCC practice over I feel exceedingly tired. And relaxed. And grateful that this day is drawing to a close....
T'ai Chi Chih Travelogue
Yes, dear readers, I'm back. What follows is my written travelogue from the Upper Midwest to the East Coast (Charles Town, WV) and back again. Frances and I flew halfway across the country to spend Thanksgiving with my brother, my sister, and her boyfriend. These entries come from my written journal and flow chronologically from our date of departure.
Wednesday, November 24, 2010 -- Thanksgiving Eve
Frances and I experienced an easy, event-free drive to the Twin Cities, starting at 2:40 am until our early arrival at the MSP airport around 8:00 am. Security required no full body scans though I did witness one extra-diligent pat down of a female passenger.
After we located our departure gate I took over luggage surveillance while Frances searched for breakfast. When she returned, I headed for a flight observation deck to practice T'ai Chi Chih.
What a find! I climbed two flights of stairs and arrived in a quiet space with windows on four sides. Classical music played in the background with occasional interruptions for final gate departure announcements.
Since three people already occupied the room I chose a location at the far end and began my practice. The observation area was the perfect relaxation spot. I watched planes taxi away from and toward from their gates, saw an occasional plane land, and truly felt that I was--indeed--above it all.
I felt a tremendous amount of energy as I moved and quickly settled into my form paying no mind to my co-observers. As people left and arrived conversations were quietly respectful. Of course! This is what you'd expect to find on a viewing platform ... a woman calmly and quietly shifting weight and energy; balancing and carrying balls; circling back and forth, round and round.
In several hours our plane will land at Washington D.C.'s Dulles Airport and we'll enter a warmer climate and a foreign domain. Then family reunions and thanks-giving festivities begin!
Thursday, November 25, 2010 -- Thanksgiving Day
I'm thankful for the many blessings of my life (first and foremost, life itself)! I'm grateful to my sister and her boyfriend for bringing us here to share Thanksgiving with them. They're also offering us the opportunity to learn a bit about their lives in Charles Town, WV (named after George Washington's brother, Charles).
I'm thankful for the adventure of travel and for new discoveries ... for food and family (not necessarily in that order), and for a TCC practice that travels with me wherever I go, whatever I do.
My 6:30 am TCC practice helped to settle my excitable energy and ease me out of my traveler's fog. Mind you, I'm still tired but I do feel more relaxed.
The weather upon arrival yesterday was 50 degrees and sunny. Rain is predicted. Still, we flew out of an area with winter storm warnings and into early fall (grass is green and some leaves still hang from the trees).
Soon the food prep begins. In fact, it may be beginning now given the activity I hear in the kitchen above.
Hearty thanks and gratitude for my TCC students, the TCC community, Justin Stone, TCC's originator, and a TCC practice that provides me with the subject matter for this blog. I feel grateful, as well, for this daily writing practice that constantly reminds me how important it is to take time for self-reflection, creativity, and gratitude.
Today, on the first anniversary of this daily TCC practice and blog, I feel tremendous appreciation for this journey I'm traveling regardless of the final destination.
Friday, November 26, 2010
My TCC practice offers me plenty of opportunities to set and practice my boundaries. In order to perform my practice and write my blog I must take time and space away from everyone else and devote at least an hour to myself and my meditation and writing. When I was younger, that would have felt difficult.
Now, though, with the guidance, wisdom, and need for TCC practice, I find that I value my time alone. I feel better after I've practiced TCC, written, and spent time by myself. The time I take for peace and rejuvenation is undeniably essential. It took me many, many years to learn this remarkably simple fact.
And, yes absolutely, when I feel peaceful within, it is much easier to maintain that peace-filled presence with those around me.
Our family entourage took a history walk around Charles Town today and found remnants of the Civil War. A sword or bayonet cemented into a stone property fence. A cemetery where Confederate soldiers were laid to rest, and beautiful old mansions scattered throughout town.
More food, conversation, and my late afternoon TCC practice to boost me through the evening tree-lighting festivities.
Saturday, November 27, 2010
My Thanksgiving family dynamics have caught up with me. This morning I feel sad and bad about myself. I'm weepy. I enter into my TCC practice as tears continue to flow down my cheeks.
When I Push-Pull, I focus on releasing sadness and pulling in healing energy. And still the tears flow. How appropriate that my sister scheduled a Reiki healing session for me today! I arrive with deep-seated feelings of sadness and emotional vulnerability and the practitioner reassures me that my spirit guides have prepared me well for our healing session.
After my session is complete I realize that, although the TCC practice offes me a tremendous amount of healing energy, it's also helpful to rely on the skills and abilities of others. I don't have to travel this journey all by myself. It's okay to accept help.
And so it goes. One more layer of healing sought and found. More to go....
Sunday, November 28, 2010, 5:15 pm
Today is our final full day and night in West Virginia. Frank, Mel, Frances and I took a sun-filled morning walk along the Potomac River to its confluence with the Shenandoah. We strode into Harpers Ferry and passed the infamous site where John Brown, fighting slavery, took refuge in an armory and was ultimately captured on October 18, 1859.
To pass through the streets of Civil War history is an amazing experience. After an early morning of intense emotion, I practiced TCC in the early afternoon.
I felt as if Reiki energy still surged through me from yesterday morning's healing session. My practice feel potent, my body less tense and more open as a result of the Reiki, and the Chi flowed with freedom and ease.
Monday, November 29, 2010, 7:25 pm
In flight somewhere west of Washington, D.C. Complete and total darkness. Except ... a flashing white light on the wing tip and residential lights on the ground below.
Frances and I rode to work with my sister this morning and took a mini-tour of Shenandoah University while she worked. After lunch we walked through downtown Winchester and then took off for the airport.
Fortunately we arrived early because security lines were long. I set off the alarm and was told that I needed to be patted down. I wish I could say it was a fabulous experience but it was not.
It seemed likely that a knee brace I wore was the reason I set off the alarm but, true to Standard Operating Procedure (SOP), that likelihood didn't matter. I became more distressed as the pat down progressed; first my body shook, then I began to weep. Eventually I sobbed out loud. FSA employees seemed surprised that I reacted in such a manner. I volunteered to take down my pants while under observation, remove my brace, and step through the security scanner once again.
That practical solution was against SOP but at last I was permitted to proceed and I passed through security easily. My TCC rehearsal was a mental practice in my plane seat as we backed away from the gate. I completed Carry the Ball to the Side as we lifted into the air. It was a welcome remedy after the disturbing and invasive pat down. And perhaps the timing for my TCC practice was ideal....
Tuesday, November 30, 2010, 8:40 pm
We rose at 5:30 am, spent an hour visiting with our friend, then hit the road to Bayfield. It was a long trip or, rather, longer than usual but not as long as it felt.
I drove the first stretch at 35-45 mph in ice, snow, and utter whiteness. We passed five cars in the ditch. After a stop for breakfast and a quick call to work, Frances took over behind the wheel and I napped. I made it to my library job 10 minutes late. By the time I walked in the door at home it was a six hour day on the road and six hours at work. After a TCC practice and short seated meditation, I gladly ended my day without sitting at the computer.
A few quick minutes of pen to paper and sleep came quickly and easily ... 9:00 pm touchdown in Minneapolis on Monday night, 9:00 pm beddown in Bayfield on Tuesday night. Safe and sound.
Wednesday, December 1, 2010, 7:20 pm
Interesting. Now that I've handwritten my blogs in my journal for a week I'm not clipping my fingernails in anticipation of getting back online. I admit it. I'm enjoying my computer-free lifestyle. Perhaps tomorrow?
I'm gradually reorienting myself to northwoods living. Green grass and 50 degree temps in Virginia and West Virginia to white ground and 15 degrees is quite a change of atmosphere. My body is rebelling against the dramatic change in climate at the same time that my heart and soul feel happily home again.
A headache and low energy were today's feedback loop regarding the stress of my travels. Today I stayed home and enjoyed the quiet along with a lengthy visit with neighbors.
My early evening TCC practice quivered with energy which felt absolutely great. I practiced upstairs while Frances played with the cat and dog downstairs. Despite overhearing her constant teasing and chatter, I settled deep into the rhythm and motion and let my muscles release into the repetition, pattern, and space of my practice. And, yes, I feel better.
Wednesday, November 24, 2010 -- Thanksgiving Eve
Frances and I experienced an easy, event-free drive to the Twin Cities, starting at 2:40 am until our early arrival at the MSP airport around 8:00 am. Security required no full body scans though I did witness one extra-diligent pat down of a female passenger.
After we located our departure gate I took over luggage surveillance while Frances searched for breakfast. When she returned, I headed for a flight observation deck to practice T'ai Chi Chih.
What a find! I climbed two flights of stairs and arrived in a quiet space with windows on four sides. Classical music played in the background with occasional interruptions for final gate departure announcements.
Since three people already occupied the room I chose a location at the far end and began my practice. The observation area was the perfect relaxation spot. I watched planes taxi away from and toward from their gates, saw an occasional plane land, and truly felt that I was--indeed--above it all.
I felt a tremendous amount of energy as I moved and quickly settled into my form paying no mind to my co-observers. As people left and arrived conversations were quietly respectful. Of course! This is what you'd expect to find on a viewing platform ... a woman calmly and quietly shifting weight and energy; balancing and carrying balls; circling back and forth, round and round.
In several hours our plane will land at Washington D.C.'s Dulles Airport and we'll enter a warmer climate and a foreign domain. Then family reunions and thanks-giving festivities begin!
Thursday, November 25, 2010 -- Thanksgiving Day
I'm thankful for the many blessings of my life (first and foremost, life itself)! I'm grateful to my sister and her boyfriend for bringing us here to share Thanksgiving with them. They're also offering us the opportunity to learn a bit about their lives in Charles Town, WV (named after George Washington's brother, Charles).
I'm thankful for the adventure of travel and for new discoveries ... for food and family (not necessarily in that order), and for a TCC practice that travels with me wherever I go, whatever I do.
My 6:30 am TCC practice helped to settle my excitable energy and ease me out of my traveler's fog. Mind you, I'm still tired but I do feel more relaxed.
The weather upon arrival yesterday was 50 degrees and sunny. Rain is predicted. Still, we flew out of an area with winter storm warnings and into early fall (grass is green and some leaves still hang from the trees).
Soon the food prep begins. In fact, it may be beginning now given the activity I hear in the kitchen above.
Hearty thanks and gratitude for my TCC students, the TCC community, Justin Stone, TCC's originator, and a TCC practice that provides me with the subject matter for this blog. I feel grateful, as well, for this daily writing practice that constantly reminds me how important it is to take time for self-reflection, creativity, and gratitude.
Today, on the first anniversary of this daily TCC practice and blog, I feel tremendous appreciation for this journey I'm traveling regardless of the final destination.
Friday, November 26, 2010
My TCC practice offers me plenty of opportunities to set and practice my boundaries. In order to perform my practice and write my blog I must take time and space away from everyone else and devote at least an hour to myself and my meditation and writing. When I was younger, that would have felt difficult.
Now, though, with the guidance, wisdom, and need for TCC practice, I find that I value my time alone. I feel better after I've practiced TCC, written, and spent time by myself. The time I take for peace and rejuvenation is undeniably essential. It took me many, many years to learn this remarkably simple fact.
And, yes absolutely, when I feel peaceful within, it is much easier to maintain that peace-filled presence with those around me.
Our family entourage took a history walk around Charles Town today and found remnants of the Civil War. A sword or bayonet cemented into a stone property fence. A cemetery where Confederate soldiers were laid to rest, and beautiful old mansions scattered throughout town.
More food, conversation, and my late afternoon TCC practice to boost me through the evening tree-lighting festivities.
Saturday, November 27, 2010
My Thanksgiving family dynamics have caught up with me. This morning I feel sad and bad about myself. I'm weepy. I enter into my TCC practice as tears continue to flow down my cheeks.
When I Push-Pull, I focus on releasing sadness and pulling in healing energy. And still the tears flow. How appropriate that my sister scheduled a Reiki healing session for me today! I arrive with deep-seated feelings of sadness and emotional vulnerability and the practitioner reassures me that my spirit guides have prepared me well for our healing session.
After my session is complete I realize that, although the TCC practice offes me a tremendous amount of healing energy, it's also helpful to rely on the skills and abilities of others. I don't have to travel this journey all by myself. It's okay to accept help.
And so it goes. One more layer of healing sought and found. More to go....
Sunday, November 28, 2010, 5:15 pm
Today is our final full day and night in West Virginia. Frank, Mel, Frances and I took a sun-filled morning walk along the Potomac River to its confluence with the Shenandoah. We strode into Harpers Ferry and passed the infamous site where John Brown, fighting slavery, took refuge in an armory and was ultimately captured on October 18, 1859.
To pass through the streets of Civil War history is an amazing experience. After an early morning of intense emotion, I practiced TCC in the early afternoon.
I felt as if Reiki energy still surged through me from yesterday morning's healing session. My practice feel potent, my body less tense and more open as a result of the Reiki, and the Chi flowed with freedom and ease.
Monday, November 29, 2010, 7:25 pm
In flight somewhere west of Washington, D.C. Complete and total darkness. Except ... a flashing white light on the wing tip and residential lights on the ground below.
Frances and I rode to work with my sister this morning and took a mini-tour of Shenandoah University while she worked. After lunch we walked through downtown Winchester and then took off for the airport.
Fortunately we arrived early because security lines were long. I set off the alarm and was told that I needed to be patted down. I wish I could say it was a fabulous experience but it was not.
It seemed likely that a knee brace I wore was the reason I set off the alarm but, true to Standard Operating Procedure (SOP), that likelihood didn't matter. I became more distressed as the pat down progressed; first my body shook, then I began to weep. Eventually I sobbed out loud. FSA employees seemed surprised that I reacted in such a manner. I volunteered to take down my pants while under observation, remove my brace, and step through the security scanner once again.
That practical solution was against SOP but at last I was permitted to proceed and I passed through security easily. My TCC rehearsal was a mental practice in my plane seat as we backed away from the gate. I completed Carry the Ball to the Side as we lifted into the air. It was a welcome remedy after the disturbing and invasive pat down. And perhaps the timing for my TCC practice was ideal....
Tuesday, November 30, 2010, 8:40 pm
We rose at 5:30 am, spent an hour visiting with our friend, then hit the road to Bayfield. It was a long trip or, rather, longer than usual but not as long as it felt.
I drove the first stretch at 35-45 mph in ice, snow, and utter whiteness. We passed five cars in the ditch. After a stop for breakfast and a quick call to work, Frances took over behind the wheel and I napped. I made it to my library job 10 minutes late. By the time I walked in the door at home it was a six hour day on the road and six hours at work. After a TCC practice and short seated meditation, I gladly ended my day without sitting at the computer.
A few quick minutes of pen to paper and sleep came quickly and easily ... 9:00 pm touchdown in Minneapolis on Monday night, 9:00 pm beddown in Bayfield on Tuesday night. Safe and sound.
Wednesday, December 1, 2010, 7:20 pm
Interesting. Now that I've handwritten my blogs in my journal for a week I'm not clipping my fingernails in anticipation of getting back online. I admit it. I'm enjoying my computer-free lifestyle. Perhaps tomorrow?
I'm gradually reorienting myself to northwoods living. Green grass and 50 degree temps in Virginia and West Virginia to white ground and 15 degrees is quite a change of atmosphere. My body is rebelling against the dramatic change in climate at the same time that my heart and soul feel happily home again.
A headache and low energy were today's feedback loop regarding the stress of my travels. Today I stayed home and enjoyed the quiet along with a lengthy visit with neighbors.
My early evening TCC practice quivered with energy which felt absolutely great. I practiced upstairs while Frances played with the cat and dog downstairs. Despite overhearing her constant teasing and chatter, I settled deep into the rhythm and motion and let my muscles release into the repetition, pattern, and space of my practice. And, yes, I feel better.
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